Realizing Our Value
The unhelpful thought pattern that often veers you from taking credit – is “Disqualifying the positive.” This most often happens in women, (this is true of men too, however) who are sometimes taught that attributing their efforts as “team effort,” is better. But what if you were the one who really did all the work?
From Sheryl Sandberg’s point of view, we sabotage ourselves. We are schooled to doubt ourselves, make others happy and base our decisions on what we think other people want.
This is also when you may reject positive experiences because “they don’t count.”
Why do we do this to ourselves? Take credit; give yourself love. If you don’t value yourself at home, in the workplace or… Like a Boss….who will?
Sometimes, negative emotions can also be translated as fact. This unhelpful thought pattern is “emotional reasoning.” It’s bad enough that we don’t accept ourselves as awesome, but we read our negative thoughts as true. For example, if you forgot your keys for the 100th time. You may think, wow, I am an idiot. I feel like something’s wrong with me. Or if you just are having a down day, and feeling “worthless.”
Or if you are struggling with any sort of illness, you may tend to believe you caused it, or that you deserved it.
When this happens, remind yourself:
Don’t believe everything you think, because thoughts are not always true and feelings are not facts
“We sit off to the side of the conference table. We don’t own our ambition because we fear we won’t be liked for it – and research says we won’t be.” – Sheryl Sandberg
You are worth a lot more than your thoughts let you believe. When you start thinking how much you mean to this world, and remind yourself of your strengths, you can start believing in your thoughts. Why are we scared of our own power? Why do we “not count” how awesome we are?
(A power thought card by Louis Hay)